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More cattiness from COSMIC RELIEF

Okay, okay, we're suckers for a good story. If you have any tales of eccentric New Age cat lovers, spill 'em. And be sure to let us know whether or not it's okay to publish your letter in our ongoing Cosmic Relief forum, Ranting, Raving & ROFL, and if so, whether or not it's okay to use your name. Put it this way: we'll assume it's cool to publish your letter, under your real name, unless you tell us otherwise. Send e-mail to CosmicRelief@juno.com

By Jilly Creamer, from her book, Angels With Pointy Ears: The Spiritual Life of Cats

Now that you know about your little love's mystical mews-ings, I hope you will do as much to enhance his spiritual growth as you do your own. Of course it's equally important that you tend to kitty-poo's emotional well-being and material comfort too, for as we all know, spiritual, emotional and material fulfillment work hand-in-paw. Here are just a few of many wonderful, splendiferously loving things you can do to make all aspects of your tiny tiger's life - and yours, too! - the cat's jammies (for the complete list, of course, refer to my book):

 Experience the world the way kitty does. One way to do this is to occasionally use the litter box instead of the toilet. Oh, it may not be as comfortable as the throne, especially for prolonged magazine reading, but you'll gain so much status in the eyes of your cat that it's worth a little inconvenience. (If you have one of those covered cat boxes, remove the cover before using for best results.)

 Collect your sweetie-doodle's best hairballs and knit her a little sweater for winter.

 Give kitty a bath at least once a day. Of course your tongue isn't as rough as her mama's was, but she'll adore you for the gesture.

 If someone in your family is "allergic to cats," do not allow them to sneeze in kitcat's presence or in any other way make kitty feel guilty. After all, "allergies" are merely the result of the "allergic" person's unresolved guilt and fear, or even a spiritual imbalance. They're certainly not Puss's fault! Affirmations or psychotherapy can help; in any case, if the "allergic" person chooses not to work on themselves in order to overcome the "allergy," have them move out of the house.

 Let Pretty-Paws have free run of your house and everything in it. If she wants to jump up on the table while you're having the boss over for dinner, let her do it. If she wants to nibble off of boss's plate or stick her hind end in his face, don't try to stop her. You don't want to damage her self-esteem, do you? If boss gets aggravated over having to share a little moment with your precious angel, maybe that's not the kind of person you want to be working for. Look at it this way: you can always find another job, but Pretty-Paws is absolutely irreplaceable.

 Don't let your relationship with anyone come between you and Tabby. For example, if you're getting ready to make love and Tabby decides to pounce on your lover's "mouse," don't scold her. You could do untold damage to her sensibilities. Instead, reprimand your lover for putting his "mouse" in harm's way.

 Let your sweetcakes have free run of the neighborhood (but make sure she stays out of traffic!). Be warned, however: shocking as it may seem, not everybody loves kitties the way we do, and not everyone will feel honored by a visit from your angel. If your neighbor complains about Puss's nibbling his pansies or leaving love offerings in his backyard, there's probably nothing you can do about his black heart - but you can make sure Puss is out of earshot of his complaints. After all, you don't want to damage her sense of self.

 Show Puss you really, really love him in the time-honored way that cats have always demonstrated love for their people. Stalk, capture, and kill - with your teeth or your bare hands - some kind of small prey: a mousie, a lizard or even a tree roach will do just fine. Carry it to kitty in your mouth and drop it at his feet. Nothing makes a cat feel more cherished than this!

 But most importantly, hug your kitty, stroke her and love her and cuddle her and give her lots and lots and lots and lots of affection and attention...because if you don't, there's no telling what she might leave in those brand new $200 pumps!

Copyright © 1997 by Connie L. Schmidt. All rights reserved.

From the book Cosmic Relief: Honoring & Celebrating the Global Paradigm Shaft

Clip art from Task Force: The Really Big Edition © New Vision Technologies, Inc., Ottawa, Ontario, Canada

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